Is it ever really under control

Well, I just feel that I have to tell all what happened today and it aint good. I have lost big chunks before and I have tilted before but I have never started a session on tilt and tilted all the way through it.

Without going into finer details, I have been having a few family problems of late but that is certainly no excuse when it comes to poker. I had about $1800 which had been lying dormant in a site for a few weeks and this afternoon I tilted the lot off in a crazy series of limit hold’em short handed games at 10-20 and 30-60 just for the sheer hell of it.

The amount was no big deal but I pride myself in being professional and I honestly dont know what happened today. Maybe this was the big blowout that I had been badly in need of as ring games can get very monotonous even online or at least they seem that way to me.

I dont know, maybe I need a break from the game, winning money no longer has appeal but I have always thought that I had myself under control but this is twice now in the space of a few days that I have tilted money off.

 I am going to assess things for a few days and see what kind of mental shape I am in. Luckily it was only $1800, if this had been the 25-50 then it could have been a lot worse. It just goes to show that the tilt monster is never really very far away at all.

See you soon

The Dean